Hark at the hands of the clock
as RuPaul Andre Charles
crawls down your lum
on spindle limbs
and cloven heels.

Upright, ten feet tall,
she carries
broken branches
with which to beat the bad
and wake the dead.

On rolling tongues
and broken fangs
she snatches up
Christmas cookies,
downs sweetened schnapps
by broken bottle,
shakes golden chains
a warning.

On this huge night
when the cruel stars are hung
and the moon is fat
she click clacks through your town
profane and priestlike thing
screaming and snapping her jaws
a birther of havoc
a frightener of children
a slinking…

Finding Claire Flynn Boyle

Michael Lee Richardson

A rude ginger bitch

For a while in the early 2000s I ran a parody website pretending to be the unofficial Australian fanclub blog for UK Pop Idol runner-up Gareth Gates with a young woman named Crystal.

Crystal and I are still friends.

We’ve never met in person, but I know she’s real.

That blog, Gareth’s Love Pavilion, was part of an ecosystem of sites that were very specific to the early 2000s, a Marvel Cinematic Universe of pop culture blogs all spun-off at various points from the PopJustice forum, where Crystal and I had first started chatting. …

‘Ugh, I hate her. She’s so dense,’ said Why Bird. She sat back in her chintzy armchair and finished her third glass of wine. It was barely past noon. ‘She’s my best friend.’

Peggy Patch blanched at her passerine friend.

It had been over decade since either of them had been on television, and longer than that since they’d been in front of a camera, and Why Bird had grown fat. …

Michael Lee Richardson

BAFTA award-winning writer. Familiar with candle, with book and with bell. Rep’d by Louisa Minghella at Blake Friedmann

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